Tag Archives: MLB

John Rocker’s Book Tour Goes on “Survivor”

For some reason, former major league baseball star and notorious loudmouth John Rocker will be coming to your TV this fall.  He has been given the opportunity to compete on “Survivor.”  No, America and CBS, you don’t need John Rocker on “Survivor.”  This is the lowest you have reached with your stunt casting.   Rocker probably did it because he is currently selling his autobiography. At least Jeff Kent loved the game and really wanted to play.

For those that have never heard of Rocker (or have mercifully forgotten) here are some of his greatest hits.

  • On playing in New York:  “Imagine having to take the [Number] 7 train to the ballpark, looking like you’re [riding through] Beirut next to some kid with purple hair next to some queer with AIDS right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time right next to some 20-year-old mom with kids. It’s depressing.”
  • On Disney World:  “Well, the people who dress up in the outfits are all f–ing f–gots, man. They’re all f–ing f–gots.”
  • On the gun rights stopping Nazis: “Absolute certainties are a rare thing in this life, but one I think can be collectively agreed upon is the undeniable fact that the Holocaust would have never taken place had the Jewish citizenry of Hitler’s Germany had the right to bear arms and defended themselves with those arms.”
  • More recently, on race and the George Zimmerman trial: “If he was simply known as Jorge Zimmerman, this whole saga would have ceased to exist many, many months ago.”

 

MLB John Rocker Braves Survivor

Also, if you dare, check out his AMA on Reddit last year.  Here are his comments. I’ll give him credit for one good idea.  On baseball’s steroid policy:

“Well the guys I know who were thought to be clean that I know weren’t I’m certainly not going to out in a ridiculous forum like this. As far as the handling by MLB it seems there doing the best they can. One way to fix the problem for good is to have a positive PED test nullify a player’s contract which would give the team the opportunity to void all fiscal responsibility. That would grab your attention as a player.”

Finally, if you want to watch him on “Survivor” here’s my take on his chances.  Either he will lose quickly or go really far into the game, as a common strategy is to take the most hated person with you to the end so the others will vote against them (and for you). 

It’s also possible he could just quit.    He’s probably not an actual fan of the show (like Jeff Kent) and will not be motivated to endure those conditions long. After all, his book will get just about the same publicity no matter how long he is in the game.   So you better tune in soon or you might miss him, if it was ever possible to “miss” John Rocker.

I doubt it went well.  Rocker was seen in Cooperstown during Hall of Fame induction week, holding a pathetic raffle. On the other hand, it does look like he lost some weight.

Is that raffle a bad joke or is he that desperate?

***

Here, have some Rocker satire:

MLB Power Rankings for August 15, 2014

Major League Baseball Power Rankings for August 15, 2014

We’re heading into the heart of the pennant race. Some teams have — perhaps foolishly — added some pieces before the trade deadline. Will the risks pay off? The biggest risers are the Rays; biggest falls go to Texas and San Francisco.

I’ve divided the rankings in to 4 tiers of teams. The “Elite” are the best of the best right now. The “Contenders” are in the thick of the pennant race. Those in the “Meh-zo-sphere” cling to dreams of playing relevant September baseball, and once mathematically eliminated are shooting for .500. The “Suh-diddly-uckleheads” are already looking forward to October golfing.

Records through August 11.

Rank Record Team Rise/Fall
The Elite
1.
72-46
Oakland A’s +1
2.
68-52
Los Angeles Dodgers +6
3.
68-50
Baltimore Orioles +7
4.
66-53
Milwaukee Brewers -1
5.
68-49
Los Angeles Angels
The Contenders
6.
63-53
Washington Nationals +3
7.
64-53
Kansas City Royals +10
8.
63-53
Detroit Tigers -2
9.
63-55
Pittsburgh Pirates +9
10.
62-55
St. Louis Cardinals +3
The Meh-zo-sphere
11.
62-56
San Francisco Giants -10
12.
63-55
Seattle Mariners
13.
63-57
Toronto Blue Jays -9
14.
61-57
New York Yankees -3
15.
60-58
Atlanta Braves -8
16.
60-58
Cincinnati Reds +4
17.
59-59
Cleveland Indians -3
18.
58-60
Tampa Bay Rays +12
19.
58-60
Miami Marlins -4
20.
57-62
New York Mets +5
21.
56-63
Chicago White Sox -2
22.
55-62
San Diego Padres +5
23.
53-64
Minnesota Twins -2
24.
53-66
Philadelphia Phillies
25.
52-65
Boston Red Sox +1
The Suh-diddly-uckleheads
26.
51-67
Arizona Diamondbacks +2
27.
50-67
Chicago Cubs +2
28.
49-70
Houston Astros -5
29.
46-72
Texas Rangers -13
30.
46-72
Colorado Rockies -8

MLB Power Rankings for June 16, 2014

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Major League Baseball Power Rankings for June 16, 2014

We’re more than two months into the season and it’s getting clearer who are the “haves” and “have nots” this year.   The biggest risers this week are the Blue Jays; biggest falls go to Colorado and Boston.

I’ve divided the rankings in to 4 tiers of teams. The “Elite” are the best of the best right now. The “Contenders” are in the thick of the pennant race. Those in the “Meh-zo-sphere” cling to dreams of playing relevant September baseball, and once mathematically eliminated are shooting for .500. The “Suh-diddly-uckleheads” are already looking forward to October golfing.

Records through June 10.

Rank Record Team Rise/Fall
The Elite
1.
44-22
San Francisco Giants +1
2.
39-25
Oakland A’s +2
3.
38-26
Milwaukee Brewers
4.
39-26
Toronto Blue Jays +14
5.
35-28
Los Angeles Angels +2
The Contenders
6.
33-27
Detroit Tigers -5
7.
33-29
Atlanta Braves -2
8.
34-31
Los Angeles Dodgers
9.
33-29
Washington Nationals
10.
32-30
Baltimore Orioles
The Meh-zo-sphere
11.
31-31
New York Yankees
12.
34-29
Seattle Mariners +4
13.
33-31
St. Louis Cardinals
14.
33-31
Cleveland Indians +6
15.
33-30
Miami Marlins
16.
31-33
Texas Rangers -2
17.
31-32
Kansas City Royals
18.
30-33
Pittsburgh Pirates +9
19.
32-33
Chicago White Sox
20.
29-33
Cincinnati Reds +3
21.
29-33
Minnesota Twins +4
22.
29-34
Colorado Rockies -16
23.
29-36
Houston Astros +7
24.
25-36
Philadelphia Phillies
25.
28-35
New York Mets -4
The Suh-diddly-uckleheads
26.
28-35
Boston Red Sox -14
27.
28-35
San Diego Padres -7
28.
28-38
Arizona Diamondbacks
29.
25-36
Chicago Cubs
30.
24-41
Tampa Bay Rays -4

MLB Power Rankings for May 19, 2014

Major League Baseball Power Rankings for May 19, 2014

We’re 7 weeks into the season and it’s getting clearer who are the “haves” and “have nots” this year.  The Brewers and Giants are off to a hot start, while disappointment reigns in Pittsburgh and Tampa.

I’ve divided the rankings in to 4 tiers of teams. The “Elite” are the best of the best right now. The “Contenders” are in the thick of the pennant race. Those in the “Meh-zo-sphere” cling to dreams of playing relevant September baseball, and once mathematically eliminated are shooting for .500. The “Suh-diddly-uckleheads” are already looking forward to October golfing.

Records through May 14.

Rank Record Team Rise/Fall
The Elite
1.
24-12
Detroit Tigers +7
2.
26-15
San Francisco Giants +21
3.
25-15
Milwaukee Brewers +23
4.
25-16
Oakland A’s
5.
22-17
Atlanta Braves +4
The Contenders
6.
23-19
Colorado Rockies +12
7.
21-18
Los Angeles Angels +7
8.
22-20
Los Angeles Dodgers -7
9.
21-19
Washington Nationals +6
10.
20-18
Baltimore Orioles
The Meh-zo-sphere
11.
20-19
New York Yankees -8
12.
20-19
Boston Red Sox -10
13.
20-20
St. Louis Cardinals -8
14.
20-20
Texas Rangers -8
15.
21-20
Miami Marlins +14
16.
20-20
Seattle Mariners +6
17.
20-19
Kansas City Royals
18.
20-21
Toronto Blue Jays +2
19.
20-22
Chicago White Sox +9
20.
19-21
San Diego Padres +4
21.
19-21
New York Mets
22.
19-21
Cleveland Indians -10
23.
17-20
Cincinnati Reds -12
24.
17-21
Philadelphia Phillies -5
25.
18-20
Minnesota Twins
The Suh-diddly-uckleheads
26.
18-23
Tampa Bay Rays -13
27.
17-22
Pittsburgh Pirates -20
28.
16-27
Arizona Diamondbacks -12
29.
13-25
Chicago Cubs -2
30.
14-27
Houston Astros