Crap You Don’t Need: Makeup

There’s a long list of useless crap people buy, use, or own that they really don’t need.  Well, they think they need it for some reason.  Maybe it is something in our culture, effective manipulative advertising, or just an individual weakness.
 
Today’s edition of Crap You Don’t Need:  Makeup.  I know this one seems like I’m mocking the ladies, but believe me, the guys will get theirs too.  Men have an equally long list of silly things they waste time/money on.
 
The whole concept of makeup is a lie.  Some of it is literally called “concealer.”  Doesn’t the standard become pointless when the standard requires lying?  This is like if I give you a test to see if you can multiply, then force you to use a calculator.  It is not really a measurement of your math skills but how well you use a calculator.  So how people judge your beauty depends not on how you actually look but on how skilled a painter you are. 
 
So makeup is a lie.  We know it is a lie.  You are not fooling anybody.  You can dunk your entire head in a bucket of blue paint; your eyes are still brown.
 
Women don’t wear makeup for men; they wear it for other women.  They say men only care about one thing, and there isn’t a billion-dollar industry selling paint for it.  Makeup is for women who care about and/or fear being judged by other women.  Not to solely blame women for this; our society has selected appearance as a category we judge others by.  Women exist within that society and are willingly or not subject to its standards.  (Perhaps there will be enough people to form a critical mass to change those standards.) 
 
On the other hand, as far as judging goes there are worse categories that could have been chosen than looks.  Can you imagine what it would be like if we were as critical about how our voices sounded as we are about looks?  I envision ads for voice synthesizers and weird throat surgeries.  What if our society adopted dog standards?  There would be a lot of money to be made in selling butt perfume. 

If we judged each other by taste (get your mind out of the gutter right now!) by licking each other’s faces, imagine what kind of culinary concoctions would be applied.  The bullying would take on a far different tone:

Woman 1: “She’s such a bitch, and way too much pesto!”
Woman 2: “I know! She really tastes like sh*t!”
Woman 1: “How do you know what sh*t tastes like?”
Woman 2: “Shut up!”

 
That being said, some individuals do relish judging others.  Belittling someone else is the easiest way for them to feel good about themselves.  So my guess is the obsessive use of makeup has more to do with avoiding female bullying than trying to attract a male. 
 
In some cases makeup might be necessary:  For your job … if you are a clown; if you are having an open casket; if you are having your special pretty princess day; or if you are the Joker going out in disguise.  Otherwise, makeup easily makes the list of Crap You Don’t Need.